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DYOR Dave’s Guide To Summer Cocktails

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DYOR Dave’s Guide To Summer Cocktails

DYOR Dave

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The silly season is well and truly underway and dribblers & dribblettes around the nation are kicking back, relaxing, and most importantly, drinking cocktails before lunch. Having just enjoyed a lovely and probably not very well deserved break, I thought I would help the punters and dribblers get into the spirit of summer with a few easy cocktail recipes that I’ve learned from my previous life as a bartender.

For these recipes you can put away the shaker and any other fancy tools that you may use to show off, these are for even the most clueless of cocktail drinking dribblers.

 

Tommy’s Marg

A common misconception, the Tommy’s Margarita wasn’t named after Tom Trbojevic or Tom Birmingham, but it goes down just as easy as a length-of-the-field try from the former or a piece of dribble from the latter. All you need is 60ml of your favourite tequila, 30ml of fresh lime juice and 15ml of agave syrup, available at most supermarkets. (Can also use Maple syrup or sugar syrup with equal parts sugar and water). Mix it and serve it over ice, then repeat 3-5 times as necessary.

The best thing about this recipe is its versatility, no Tequila? Use rum and you’ve got a daiquiri. Only got gin? That’s called a gimlet. It even  Pretend you’re an expert by making 3 cocktails with one recipe.

 

Pina Colada

Perfect for the dribbler or dribblette who’s not into yoga and has half a brain, the Pina colada is a creamy tropical treat that packs a punch with your daily dose of rum. Just combine  75ml of pineapple juice with 25ml of canned coconut cream and 50ml (or more) of rum. Give it a good mix and chuck it over some ice, you’ll feel like you’re on a beach in Jamaica while you’re drinking it, and after a few, you’ll feel like you’ve just spent a night in Fortitude Valley with Quade Cooper.

 

Espresso martini

Been sitting in the sun all day? Haven’t got the energy to get yourself up for the night’s festivities and not willing to splash a few hundred pesos on red bulls? Espresso Martini is the perfect pick-me-up after a long hot summer’s day. All you need is 30ml of vodka, 30ml of cold coffee and 30ml of Kahlua or coffee liqueur (Mr Black is my pick). Mix it or shake with over ice, and voilà, you’ve got yourself the grown-up version of a vodka red bull.

White linen optional, but prefferred in some areas of Sydney

White linen optional, but prefferred in some areas of Sydney

 

Lychee Martini

This one is sure to be a hit with the dribblettes and the dribblers who aren’t afraid of getting a bit fruity. Bars love to charge upwards of $20 for this cocktail which is almost always made using low-quality vodka and canned lychees from the supermarket. All you need is 45ml of Vodka, 60ml of the juice from canned lychees, 30ml of lemon juice and 15ml of agave, maple or sugar syrup. Up the quantities and make this as a big batch for everyone to share, it’s a guaranteed hit and is as smashable as they come.

 

Whiskey Highball

A Japanese classic, the whiskey highball is a great way to enjoy your favourite whizzo in a refreshing and easy drinking way, perfect for summer arvos. Just add 50ml of whiskey and soda water in a glass with a heap of ice and a slice of lemon and you’re good to go. If you want something a bit sweeter you can try ginger ale or Tonic water if you’ve got an Irish or Canadian whiskey.

 

Cuba libré

This is just a fancy word for rum and coke. If you don’t know how to make a rum and coke then I’m impressed you’ve been able to access the internet to see this article. Excite your guests by serving a tropical, foreign-sounding cocktail while staying true to the tradition of your mates. It’s easy to sound less like a bogan and more like a Caribbean connoisseur by serving Cuba Libre’s instead of a black rat out of a can. Add a slice lime for a burst of citrus and a touch of panache.

 

Fancy yourself as a bit of a writer? Got some unqualified opinion and unwavering bias you’d like to share with the world? Send it through to dyor@hellosport.com.au to be featured on the site

 

Check out the Latest Hello Sport Podcast episode #325 – Covid Nangs

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Break Out the Chinos and Linen – Merivale have Announced their Menus for the SCG and SFS

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Break Out the Chinos and Linen – Merivale have Announced their Menus for the SCG and SFS

DYOR Dave

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With the summer of cricket right around the corner, and the new stadium nearing completion, Sydneysiders will finally be able to eat the overpriced food they love while watching the sports they pretend to like. No longer will people have to choose between a long lunch at Mr Wong’s and an afternoon of cricket, with the two cultural traditions able to be experienced all at once.

The hospitality conglomerate run Justin Hemmes has recently signed on to provide food and drinks at the two Moore park stadiums for the next six years, and they’ve just announced the lineup for this summer, much to the delight of Swans fans who own more pairs of RM Williams’ than they do guernseys.

Vinnies Pizza, Jimmy’s Falafel’s, Queen Chow Dumplings, El Loco Mexican and Paddington’s The Chicken Shop will feature across the SCG this summer, while a French bistro will be serving red wine and steak frites to the upper echelons of the SCG society, the members. It is currently unclear whether or not the red wine will be served in a plastic glass with a vacuum-sealed plastic lid.

This new partnership has been recognised as a significant step forward for stadium hospitality services, with Hemmes saying “The aim has been to provide restaurant quality food in a stadium environment while making sure it’s affordable and accessible.” Never before in Australia has quality food been served in stadiums, nor has any stadium food ever been affordable, let alone accessible, with overwhelming queues at every break of play.

Disrespecting the memory of Sir Don, a famous meat pie operator

Disrespecting the memory of Sir Don, a famous meat pie operator

 

It is expected that the addition of these outlets to the stadium will more than double the average attendances for Roosters games, as the NRL club had been dramatically losing fans to Totti’s reservations and lines outside Coogee Pavilion. Membership numbers have already seen a rise, with unconfirmed reports that a new membership package will soon be launched, providing fans with a $50 Merivale voucher (enough for one cocktail) as well as a signed Champagne cork from Hemmes himself.

Executives at Merivale are relishing the opportunity to employ and probably underpay more than 1000 new staff, who will no doubt enjoy dealing with fans’ expectations of high-class food at low-class speeds and prices. Their first assignment will assumably be cleaning out the grease traps that haven’t been emptied in decades, which are rumoured to be the true source of that distinctive stadium-food taste.

For the traditionalists out there, much-loved staples like $5 meat pies, chips and hot dogs will still be available, as will standard drinks like bottled water and Coke, which still cost $4.50 for some absurd reason. So if you’re craving a bit of old-fashioned mystery meat, you won’t be disappointed.

 

Fancy yourself as a bit of a writer? Got some unqualified opinion and unwavering bias you’d like to share with the world? Send it through to dyor@hellosport.com.au to be featured on the site

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Perth Test May Require Balls Hit for Six to be Replaced under Covid Regulations

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Perth Test May Require Balls Hit for Six to be Replaced under Covid Regulations

DYOR Dave

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With the start of the Ashes series less than a month away, the pressure is beginning to mount on the Western Australian Government to officially sanction the 5th test to go ahead at the WACA. Despite Tasmania desperately trying to steal it off them, WA are expected to lock in a decision this week, although there may be a few extra rules to abide by for the players and spectators.

As Western Australia has become the hermit kingdom of the nation, barely allowing flies to cross the border, it’s no surprise that supreme leader Mark McGowan has insisted on the most stringent of measures to be put in place. A key factor in the covid restrictions is minimising the contact between players and fans, meaning the ball may have to be replaced every time a six is hit.

Already in the past year, we’ve seen balls requiring disinfectant after being hit for six in the Big Bash, as well as a direction from the government for South Australian AFL crowds to “duck” if the ball comes their way. Additionally, cricketers have now been banned from using saliva to shape the ball, with players unsuccessfully attempting to use sweat and dew to replicate the lubrication that saliva brings.

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Having to change to a new ball after every six could dramatically alter the strategies of both teams, as the amount of shine present on the nut has a tremendous influence on the game being played. However, it may mean a few lucky fans could go home with a rare souvenir, providing they either catch a six or fight off the rest of the dribblers in the crowd to secure the ball.

While players may be unhappy about the possibility of this rule being introduced, the biggest winners out of this situation would be Kookaburra, who would be working overtime to produce and sell dozens of pristine cherries to be used. With the added profit from that, there appears no reason why Kookaburra isn’t able to branch out their partnerships to include a certain top-of-the-heap podcast. (Reach out Kookaburra)

It’s expected that the Test will be moved a day later to the 15th of January, to ensure the teams have five days in quarantine prior to the match, and two days during. By that stage, Australia would have already wrapped up the series 4-0 and will be looking towards a whitewash, as the state of the ball, pitch, or city realistically won’t have much of an impact on the Aussies domination.

 

Fancy yourself as a bit of a writer? Got some unqualified opinion and unwavering bias you’d like to share with the world? Send it through to dyor@hellosport.com.au to be featured on the site

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Who replaces Justin Langer if he gets Rissoled?

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Who replaces Justin Langer if he gets Rissoled?

by Intern Brayden

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As Summer approaches, it’s safe to say that the Australian Cricket Team is in a concerning form slump. In all formats of the game our national side has struggled, beginning in January with a Test Series loss to a Kohli-less India, to most recently dishing up our worst ever T20 performance falling to Bangladesh. All Australian’s are proud of our men in Merino wool, which is why something must change. In a result driven business, fingers start to get pointed, and unfortunately in most cases they point to the Coach.

Taking over at arguably the most difficult period in Australia’s cricketing history, losing star players, Langer was dealt a cruel hand and the pressure was on from the get-go. From the outside looking in, it seems this pressure is finally starting to creep up on JL and with an extremely important few months ahead that includes a World Cup and Ashes Series, we can’t afford to be off our game. We wish the best for Justin this Summer but if changes are needed, I have compiled a shortlist of candidates for the top job to help out our national selectors.

Ricky Ponting – Aged 46, 168 Tests, 13,378 runs @ 51.85

Australia’s all-time leading runs scorer and a childhood hero to most of the squad, Ricky commands respect. It’s certainly not our pacemen letting us down and being a batsman himself, I believe Ricky will bring invaluable experience and knowledge to the team. One reason he was overlooked for Langer is his hesitation in spending time away from his young family, however his priorities may have shifted in these 3 years, so is now the right time for Ricky to go the big lift?

Shane Warne – Aged 51, 145 Tests, 708 wickets @ 25.4

There are two different types of coaches – tacticians, and man managers. Whilst there is no doubting Warnie’s ability to spin a Kookaburra into next week, he is known just as well for his performances off the pitch as on it. Anyone who has watched ‘The Test’ would have seen first-hand the volatile nature of Langer’s coaching style. Likely more relaxed than Justin, Shane could provide the team with more of a tranquil environment which may be just what his players need. Currently coaching the London Spirit in England’s ‘The Hundred’ competition, could the leap to head honcho of the Australian side be the natural progression for Warnie?

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Steve Smith – Aged 32, 77 Tests, 7,540 runs @ 61.8

We’ve all forgiven Steve, haven’t we? He has well and truly bounced back from Cape Town 2018 to continue to rip and tear for his nation. I’m far from suggesting Smudge hangs up the gloves, I’m simply putting forth the idea of a captain-coach role. Smudge isn’t getting any younger and although he’s showing little sign of slowing down, his time in the international game is limited. Finding himself a coaching role, surrounded by assistants to get through the grunt work would make for a seamless transition post-retirement, and I don’t think we can rule that option out.

Wayne Bennett – Aged 71, 877 Games Coached @ 62%

It’s tough to stomach the thought of the great Wayne Bennett taking a year off coaching. If anyone knows how to pick a side out of the mud and turn them around, nobody is more proven than Wayne. Having already coached the national side in Rugby League, Wayne is familiar with the responsibility that comes with the top job. The best in the business at dealing with pressure, managing selection decisions, and dealing with difficult personalities are all transferrable skills that would see Wayne excel in this position.

Matthew Hayden – Age 69, 103 Tests, 8,625 runs @ 50.7

If there’s anyone who knows how to swing a willow, it’s the man with the broadest shoulders in the known universe. Occupying the opening batsmen spot in one of the most dominant sporting teams in history for over a decade, and holding the record for the highest total by an Australian, it’s fair to say Hayden oozes success. Off the field, he’s a man in touch with nature, and his country lifestyle and homely presence could bring a calming aura to the team in times of pressure. As long as the players don’t mind swapping their yoga sessions for prayer sermons, Haydos could fit in well.

 

Fancy yourself as a bit of a writer? Got some unqualified opinion and unwavering bias you’d like to share with the world? Send it through to dyor@hellosport.com.au to be featured on the site