Christian Welch: Rugby League’s First Genius?
Christian Welch: Rugby League’s First Genius?
DYOR Dave
Rugby League players are known for a lot of things, but unfortunately, brains are not one of them. In a sport where many fans are literally campaigning to have less restrictions on how high and hard you can hit a blokes head, it’s not too surprising that the NRL is yet to produce a Nobel prize winner or Mensa affiliate, that is, until now.
On first glance, Christian Welch would strike most as the average rugby league player: strong, tall, tough, with the added bonus of being follically gifted and rather handsome. But it’s what resides underneath that cheeky smile and glorious mane that sets Welch apart from the average player.
How many NRL players can boast that they’re Harvard educated? Welchy can, after completing a professional development program in negotiation skills. These skills no doubt assist him in his duties as Director of the Rugby League Players Association, an impressive position to hold for a 26 year old prop.
It only takes a small snippet of his interviews to realise that his on-field abilities are almost equalled by his intelligence and knowledge, which is saying something considering he’s a premiership, origin and world club champion.
One of Welch’s most recent forays into the media saw him take aim at Ronald Reagan and Herbert Hoover, as he ripped into the idea of trickle down economics, stating “It’s all a lie.” While this topic of conversation may be foreign to the average ‘full credit to the boys’ player, Welch seems at home discussing the intricacies of economic policy, as he’s currently studying a Masters of Business administration
Welch is articulate and imaginative in his responses to journalists, yet not afraid to tell it like it is, and he shows a keen interest in matters adjacent to Rugby League, tweeting about the state of rugby union: “My local Union club in Bris is overflowing with numbers, the grassroots in Syd/Bris are pumping. Just total disconnect with pro game/general public..tough one to claw back in crowded Aus sports market.”
In one sentence he has already shown more critical thinking, concern and passion than the entire board of Rugby Australia, and he doesn’t even play the sport.
With the abundance of knowledge and intelligence Welch possesses, he could be excused for spending most of his time in the library researching and developing cures for covid, paths to world peace and improving the game of rugby league. However Welch is truly a man of the people, and uses his abilities to improve the lives of others, championing programs such as Voice Against Violence and State of Mind, as well as enough charitable work to balance out much of the uncharitable acts committed by other players.
Other sources have reported seeing Welch helping old people cross the street, holding doors for hours to let crowds through, carrying people’s luggage at airports, and once adopting every animal from a rescue shelter that was being closed down.
With the best years of his career still to come, fans everywhere can sit back and enjoy watching his smart and hard style of footy, before his retirement will assumably usher in a new era of NRL management spearheaded by Welch, in which he finally unites fans, journalists and administrators to come together and once and for all make Rugby League perfect.
Some dribblers may protest that Tom Trbojevic could be considered the smartest player, as he is currently studying a double Bachelors of economics and applied finance and achieved an impressive ATAR of 94.3. However the obvious disparity between him and Welch lies in their career decisions, as Welch had the foresight to join and stay a club that averages two grand final wins per decade, while Trbojevic remains loyal to a team that only averages 1 per decade.
Special mention also to Justin Olam who holds a Bachelor of applied physics and reportedly spends his weeks calculating gravitational algorithms to maximise his ability to crush opponents in tackles and barrage his way through defensive lines.
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