ABSOLUTE DRIBBLE: Indiana’s Mum and Dad are Breaking Up in NBA Week 8
by Joseph Murphy
Having watched every ball of the Gabba Test, it was hard to split my attention between Cameron Green gradually becoming Australia’s favourite son and the goings-on of the NBA, who very rudely scheduled 13 games for the first day of the Ashes. To make up for my infidelity, I’ve spent the last few days consuming an irresponsible amount of game replays, to the point where I’m hearing phantom whistles as I go about my day.
Much like any professional heading into the end of the year, no one in the NBA really feels like doing anything much right now – that’s a problem for next year. The games are still good, but bombshell-wise the league has been a bit light. Tristan Thompson, of Kardashian curse fame, has another unexpected child coming along with his personal trainer, who’s apparently leaking DM’s with the Kardashians, but at this point, it’s a played-out storyline – we’ve all seen how this goes.
One prevailing narrative has been Steph Curry’s progress towards the all-time 3-point record, which picked up steam when was 16 away. Curry focussed more attention on the record when he said he’d try and hit all 16 in one game against Portland, then proceeding to shoot the ball a good 90-or-so times in his next 4 games before finally crossing Ray Allen’s mark in New York. It’s only fitting that he beat the record at Madison Square Garden, the same place where he had his coming-out party in 2013, playing all 48 minutes and scoring 54 points including 11 3’s in a losing effort. In 2013, 11 3’s was some team’s total effort for a game, now it barely raises an eyebrow when Steph hits double digits.
I think I’ve made my admiration for Curry pretty clear in previous weeks, but it was weird to see him chase the record so openly, to the point where he was burping up shots at every opportunity. I’m happy he got the record, but I’m happier that Golden State’s offense will resume normal operations again now that the chase is over.
Indiana are heading for a classic NBA implosion
Well, here we are. I knew it was wrong to fall in love with Indiana, I said it after week 1, but I couldn’t help myself and I got my hopes up that the marriage of Domantas Sabonis and Rick Carlisle would result in some beautiful Eastern Conference offense. Instead, Mum and Dad are starting to shoot each other dangerous looks over another silent dinner, whilst rumblings get increasingly louder about each party’s respective future in Indiana.
This week, it emerged that Indiana would be willing to part with either or both of Sabonis or Myles Turner when the trade period opens on December 15. Turner is no stranger to trade rumours, he was made available for trade as soon as the Pacers learned of the NBA’s no-take-backs policy on draft night. Turner fought back this week, telling the media that he would like for his time to stop treating him like no more than a glorified role player, hoping there’s a team out there that will love him for who he really is. On top of that, Rick Carlisle, who succeeds a coach who was fired because every player hated him, is hated by all of his players. A Pacers team divided against itself cannot stand.
There’s still time for Indiana to reverse the hands on the NBA doomsday clock – if they go and win 5 games to start 2022 they might all fall in love again, but the cracks are widening. There’s no job in the NBA less stable than the head coach, and the league passes by guys quickly – Stan Van Gundy was considered an elite coach in the mid-2000’s and now he’s back on the scrap heap after New Orleans tossed him after one season. Carlisle has ridden the wave of the title he won with the Mavericks in 2011, and the fact that he hasn’t won a playoff series since then has been brushed aside with the assurance that he’s definitely a good coach. Lose this job and that becomes a valid criticism. Lose this job and suddenly Carlisle is just the guy who was lucky enough to have Dirk on his team.
Indiana has never been a team to ‘blow it up,’ preferring to maintain the status quo, but they’ve also not drafted within the top 10 of the draft since 1989. Indiana’s track record of developing their late draft picks and other discards go back as far as Reggie Miller, and more recently they hosted the best years of Victor Oladipo’s career, got Sabonis for spare parts and turned him into a two-time all-star, and managed to nab Chris Duarte late in this years’ draft. In the penumbra of the league, a place where elite free-agents won’t even think twice about, the Pacers have been forced to become the best at identifying and developing talent.
There are plenty of reasons for Indiana to let go of the dream that this year’s iteration is worth holding onto, including the most Indiana Pacers player of all time, potential number 1 pick Chet Holgrem – a 7 foot, 88-kilo tower of monstrous potential. If Indiana’s staff can get their hands on a genuine blue-chip prospect like Chet, who knows what they can do?
Never trust an NBA player in a hoodie
Ever since his foot busted through a shoe in college, Zion Williamson’s weight has been a conversation amongst NBA dribblers worldwide. Just think of the sheer amount of force needed for your foot to completely destroy a shoe while you’re running, that’s what Zion’s body is capable of without conscious thought.
Zion’s time in the league has been a mixed bag, to say the least. In his third season, he’s now missed more games through injury than he’s actually played games. When he’s been on the court, he’s been absolutely devastating, a mix of raw athleticism and power that only comes around once in a generation. He routinely throws his defender to the floor as he flies past them on the way to the basket, where at his explosive best, his shoulders are parallel to the rim.
This is a guy who could be the best player in the world and the future face of the league. The reason that Zion is good is not only ridiculously entertaining but it’s easily digestible to anyone regardless of their basketball knowledge: simply, ‘they can’t stop that big bloke from scoring’. He could be the most popular athlete in the world if he could string a few good seasons together.
However, there’s the reports that he turned up to the Pelicans training camp at close to 150 kegs and he’s struggling to recover from yet another foot injury, this time a fractured right foot. According to the Pelicans vague medical updates, Zion’s injury happened at ‘a time’ during the off-season and will be better ‘eventually’. It was weird that Zion wasn’t included in Team USA’s Olympic efforts, particularly as they’ve always liked to appoint the ‘next guy’ to be the last guy on the bench – think AD in 2012. A diet of Draymond screams Pop wisdom and KD side-mouth would have done Zion a world of good during the off-season. It seems as if Zion’s off-season diet was perhaps closer to mine, more of a Doritos at 3 pm regime.
None of this was helped by Zion’s recent appearance at a Pelicans home game, clad in an all-red Jordan tracksuit and looking more likely to get in the ring with Bam Bam Tuivasa than make his way up and down the court. Obviously, no one is going to look shredded in a 3XL, but this was a particularly unflattering getup for a guy suspected of having weight issues. Zion counteracted this by allegedly approaching a young fan at a jewellery store to compliment his shoes, before posing for a photo where he looks absolutely jacked and stacked standing next to a child and his Dad, who was no more than your average dribbler. Full credit to Zion’s PR team for staging this scenario and the clever back-story that came with it.
At this stage, I don’t know what to believe, I just want to watch Zion back on court.
There’s some pretty significant financial consequences to Zion’s time off the court. He’s eligible for an extension in the range of $18m a year next year, but if he continues to miss games, that number can drop to as low as $7m – I know, the poor bloke. There is a sense that this is a sliding doors moment. Does Zion come back in shape and resume destroying the league, or is there reason to be concerned that his body will never hold up?
Houston are breaking the rules of tanking
For the life of me, I can’t figure out how the Houston Rockets went on a 7 game win streak including scalps of Chicago, Charlotte and Brooklyn. Sure, Chicago have been decimated by covid, to the point where the Bulls are using salary cap exemptions to replace substitute players infected by covid, who themselves were replacements brought in for covid infected rostered players. Brooklyn rested Durant, but that was it, but Charlotte were fine and the Rockets put a massive 146 points on them (whilst conceding 143). Even with all those caveats, you have to credit Houston, their win streak immediately following a 15-game losing streak. I’m not going to DYOR this, but I’m willing to go out on a limb and say that no professional sporting team has ever strung together two streaks like that- real outhouse to penthouse stuff.
Somehow, despite refusing to attend training camp, rocking up overweight to start the season and wantonly criticising the team whilst still a member of it, James Harden got the typical returning hero video treatment when he arrived in Houston. Somewhere, Rockets owner and author of the handbook for racist NBA owners ‘Shut up and Listen’, Tilman Fertitta, is hate-watching that video, simultaneously blaring 30 Seconds to Mars to block out the pain.
One of the problems of being a tanking team is that young NBA players don’t want to lose. Houston’s current roster includes former NBL MVP Jae’Sean Tate, last year’s Turkish League MVP Alperen Sengun and livewire Kevin Porter Jr, all of whom are super competitive, talented, young players who possess the skills to win NBA games right now. Sengun is my favourite of the bunch – he’s got throwback footwork reminiscent of old-school low post scorers, he’s a smart passer and has a decent shot. He’s also a complete weirdo who talks to the ball before every free throw and seems like the kind of guy who is so completive he’d scream down the mic and throw his controller into the wall if you beat him at Fifa. Young Euro players normally get over-complimented just for having average skill sets, but Sengun’s footwork is already elite and will only improve. If he’s the third-best guy on a team in 5 years, that’s a good team.
Outside of their young guys, the Rockets latest run has included the resurgence of Eric Gordon, who was the elite shooter outside Harden and CP3 during the contending years and is now a deadly off-the-dribble scorer again. Christian Wood has been a stud the last 3 years, a favourite amongst league pass tragics and one of the most elite bigs when it comes to navigating pick and roll action as the screener. Houston has made it known that Wood and Gordon are available in a trade, and can probably fetch a first-round pick or two for Wood. Both of these guys are ready to contribute to a playoff team, and Houston wants as many draft picks as they can get.
That said, teams will probably keep treating Houston as a game off, and it won’t be long until the Rockets start shutting down their young guys for extended periods for things like ‘knee soreness’ to keep their draft odds high.
The league will pick itself back up again around Christmas. Christmas day is always full of rivalry games and top-tier pairings which forces guys to actually play hard. As I’m writing this, Kyrie Irving has released a video of him putting on basketball shoes as rumours swirl that he might actually play this year. There’ll be plenty more yarn coming out of the league soon enough.
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